This is not in the order you might expect, but all will be revealed.
Zeppo in a Russ Columbo mood, with time out for toast and jam delightfully consumed by Miss Todd, then the equestrian version with a modernized banana:
Groucho with a guitar and some Perelmanesque byplay that references Theodore Dreiser:
And more variations on this pretty theme, audio only:
with a return to the 2015 version, a triumph of passion and control:
I always thought this song had a simplistic melody — lines that one might have played with one finger on a piano keyboard in C, ascending and descending. But the 2015 version presented here, by Marc Caparone, cornet, and Ray Skjelbred, piano, at the San Diego Jazz Fest, shows me that it’s not only the clever lyrics by Kalmar that make the song memorable. However, those lyrics — sung sweetly by Zeppo, sung in his own faux-Italian vaudeville fashion by Chico, whistled by Harpo — stay in our minds. When Groucho demolishes them in the canoe, world-wearily suggesting that love is resistible, “just inviting trouble for the poor [s]ucker who . . . ” the effect is powerful, even before we get to the duck, the oar, and more. Incidentally, Groucho’s take on romance — sour as it is — is what we could expect from a motion picture whose title everyone would recognize as a polite version of HORSE SHIT?
But I digress. Beautiful melodic improvisations don’t need sophisticated material. It’s what you do with it that counts.
May your happiness increase!