dustin-hoffman“If God was to say to me, ‘You want to play really good jazz piano, you have to give up what you are doing,’ I would do it in a minute.”

Hoffman to Meg Grant, “Just Dustin,” AARP, March/April 2009.

Admittedly, to some readers I might have less to give up that Hoffman, but that’s no excuse for his shoplifting this chunk of my inner life.

Dusty, I don’t care how many Oscars you’ve won.  Get the hell off my piano bench.  There isn’t room for the two of us.

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